The Giving Season & Speed Dating (Books 4 & 5/26)

My parents gave me a Kindle Fire for Christmas, and it's seriously screwing with my Amazon recommendations. Because even though it's usually cheaper to buy books I want through Kindle versions, there are hundreds and hundreds of free books on there. Sure, there are the classics, but I know how those go. So I've been downloading lots of really horrible novels just because they're free, and deleting them about 20 pages in. I've probably read about 10 more books total, it's just that those 10 books are made of the first chapters of many, many books. And now that's all Amazon wants to show me--pages upon pages of covers that either look like pastel explosions or are in dark & bold colors with half-obscured bodies on them.

Anyway, two books that I did manage to make it through are The Giving Season and Speed Dating.

The Giving Season was actually pretty enjoyable. A bit trite (but aren't all romances?), and the story's set-up leaves you thinking that the heroine has some serious judgement problems (she's lonely and desperate enough that she agrees to spend Thanksgiving through Christmas with a man who she just met on a bus?), but after the first couple of chapters she becomes really relatable and likable. He, of course, is Mr. Dreamboat, his kids are adorable, and even his mom is awesome. Other than the "going home with a complete stranger," there was nothing outlandish about the plot (always a huge gripe of mine with romance novels), which casts the crazy-ass ex-wife seeking a reconciliation as the villain. By the end of the book, I kind of wanted to go ride random buses and see if a guy would invite me home for a month...So, The Giving Season is definitely worth the small purchase price if you're looking for a few hours' worth of entertainment.

Speed Dating is one of those novels I'd seen on racks in Brookshires by the check-out counters and mocked mercilessly. It's from a NASCAR-themed Harlequin series, and nothing seemed more redneck woman than that. When I saw it for free, curiosity won out, and I have to admit--I almost didn't count it toward my challenge out of pure shame that I read the whole thing. I think it was the plot's similarity to my admitted literary obsession--marriages of convenience--that kept me hooked.

An actuary, through an implausible series of events that make the girl in The Giving Season seem sane from the get-go, ends up travelling around the South with a hotshot NASCAR driver as his good luck charm/fake girlfriend (to prevent his crazy-ass ex-wife from continuing to pursue a reconciliation--which of course she doesn't [stop, that is]). It's got the added squick bonus of a real NASCAR driver making "cameo" appearances and aiding with the romantic storyline, and something just seems wrong about that...although I'm sure he probably got enough money to keep him from feeling too weird about it.

The scene that I'm sure is supposed to be the climactic scene left me honestly saying out loud "Where the fuck did that come from?" because it suddenly turns from adults in a tense situation that should be handled seriously to a husband telling his wife he's washing her mouth out with soap and then spanking her, and he is serious. I guess it wasn't a horribly terrible read (unlike the "doctor inherits twins" book I deleted after 1 chapter earlier today), but I certainly wouldn't even pay a quarter at a thrift store if I stumbled across anymore books from this series.

WTF?

Pretty Woman is on ABC Family.

Now, I love Pretty Woman as much as the next hopeless romantic. However, I just have to wonder: In what world is a movie about a prostitute a family-friendly film?

Then again, this is the channel that has the Secret Life of the American Teenager show, so maybe a love story with a prostitute is a step in the right direction...

Jane (book 3/26)

If you stick around for any amount of time, you'll see that one of my big loves in both books & films is adaptations of classic novels. As much as I enjoy faithful adapations and retellings, I also have a huge weak spot for modernized retellings (hence the debacle that was From Prada to Nada).

Jane by April Lindner is a modernized retelling of Jane Eyre. I do recommend it; I finished it in one day (I stayed up until after midnight on Christmas eve just so I could get to the end). Now, I have only read Jane Eyre once, during the summer between fourth & fifth grade after I became obsessed with the story following a viewing of the Orson Welles adaptation (What can I say? I was a weird kid.), but from what I recall from the book & numerous BBC adaptations, this retelling is very faithful to the source material.

Mr. Rochester is now Nico Rathburn, a has-been rocker who's about to stage a comeback. Jane Moore is hired to be nanny to his illegitimate daughter from a slutty model, and the typical "fall in love, find out your fiance has a crazy wife in the attic, run from your problems, return after a catastrophe" plot follows. And that's kind of the weakness of the story: there are some things in the Jane Eyre original story that just wouldn't fly today, and that hurts this faithful reboot.

While Ms. Lindner usually does a great job with updating the story, I took issue with a couple of parts of the plot:

First, I didn't like that Nico would go ahead and try to marry Jane even though he has never divorced his first wife. That made me lose respect for the character because while the original Mr. Rochester didn't have the option of divorce, Nico undoubtedly knows all about divorce and bigamy.

Second, I didn't like that after Jane left she never tried to find out about Nico's daughter. She supposedly had a strong bond with the girl, but we didn't see her worrying about the poor kid after Jane fled (People magazine has a whole creepy sub-site dedicated to the children of celebs; it's not like she wouldn't be able to get some sort of update). By the end of the novel, the child's been shipped back to her Paris Hilton of a mother who was painted as a horrible guardian all along, which also makes you lose some more sympathy for Nico.

And finally, there wasn't really a good build of affection between Nico and Jane. In the original Jane Eyre, it wasn't such an issue because you weren't expected to date and form a strong passionate relationship before you married. However, today, that's how we operate. There were precious few scenes that convinced me Nico really loved Jane; instead, at times it seemed more like he was in love with the fact that a young girl was still attracted to him.

Despite my issues with the story, I did still enjoy it immensely. When I finished I had a big smile on my face, and I put it back on my bookshelf instead of adding it to the stack to put in my classroom, so I obviously have a desire to read it again...

Bet Me & The Cinderella Deal (Books 1 & 2/26)

Jennifer Crusie is a fun author to visit, even if almost all of her novels begin to blend together after a while. She's definitely a firm believer in the romance novel formula as every one of her books I've ever read follows the exact same format (two people meet-cute but hate each other, they're thrown together in some "please suspend your disbelief" way, they fight a mutual attraction only to eventually give in [sex scene placement option 1], a misunderstanding separates them, and then they're reunited [sex scene placement option 2]). But I'd be a raging hypocrite if I called this a problem, as I am frequently heard spouting the argument "Well, of COURSE we know they're going to get together! The whole fun of it is seeing HOW." when anyone argues against watching another romcom or me buying another pink-covered book. That's why I have no shame in having several of Jennifer Crusie's novels in my rereading rotation.

Bet Me is among my favorite books. That's a dreadful statement coming from someone with a degree in English Literature, I know, but it is. It's terribly enjoyable, and I have a crush on all three of the main guys in the novel (well, Roger is kind of a pushover...but Cal is fantastic and Tony is awesome and totally one of my BookBoyfriends). Jennifer Crusie has called this the best book she'll ever write, and I agree. It's laugh-out-loud funny and unbelievably hot. There's a lot of sarcasm and quick-witted humor, which I really enjoy. It's full of good food, characters you'd want to be friends with, and a kid you'd love to adopt even if he does barf all the time. The scenes with the antagonists do get a bit tedious, and I'll admit to skimming them on a couple of my rereadings of this novel, but I don't remember having that feeling until the number of rereads reached close to double-digits.

Cinderella Deal is one that I cannot figure out why it took me this long to read. It's by Jenny Crusie, which is usually a guarantee I'll enjoy it, and it has my literary obsession of a "marriage of convenience" storyline. History professor Linc pays former teacher/struggling artist Daisy's back rent if she'll agree to pose as his fiancee while he interviews at an out-of-state University. She agrees, and through a comedy of errors they end up carrying the deal through and going ahead with the marriage. This is a little less polished than some of her other novels, the plot gets a little scattered at points, and the supporting characters aren't as well developed as they are in other books; however, it's still a great book that I've reread three times in just three months.

Movies 2-5/26

None of the movies I've watched so far in the challenge have inspired me to ramble on about them except Crazy Stupid Love, so I haven't been posting for each one. Here's quick recaps of my recent viewing:

Source Code is the most entertaining of the group. I had the "twist" figured out about 3 minutes in, but it was still fun to go on the journey. That actually made me feel a bit smug, because I never figure out twists and I don't think this one was particularly obvious. Nevertheless, this movie doesn't provide a lot of material for analysis or discussion--it's a definite "popcorn" movie. But maybe just a small popcorn--way more intellectual than something like Transformers (I'm assuming--never seen Transformers). Still...it's an interesting concept that was well-acted and well-directed. Plus, it's 2 hours of Jake Gyllenhaal, which is always a plus in my book.

About Schmidt has been one of those on my "I really should watch that" list for a while, so when it came on Starz this month I went ahead and tuned in. It was definitely a superior film, and I think the only reason I don't want to write a novel about it is because I'm not particularly a fan of Jack Nicholson, so that dampened my enjoyment. But even that wasn't enough to make me *dislike* him--on the contrary, I cared deeply for Schmidt. Sure, he's kind of an ass, but that's what makes him so believable and relatable. By the time he did the speech at his daughter's wedding, there was a soft spot in my heart for Schmidt. This isn't a movie that will go into heavy rewatching rotation for me, but I wouldn't be adverse to tuning in again later.

Friends with Benefits is one that I watched out of curiousity more than anything. I'd watched its counterpart No Strings Attached several months ago and was surprised by how much I liked it (and it just appeared on Netflix streaming, so yay for rewatches!). Because they seemed like essentially the same movie, I decided to give FWB a chance. It is funnier than NSA, but it just felt like it was missing something. I was surprised to like the lead actors as much as I did, and there was some great casting for supporting characters, too. But in the end, I couldn't even make it all the way through a second viewing (usually a habit of mine).

From Prada to Nada is not counting because it's another "F," but I had to warn people to stay far, far away. It's an adaptation of Sense and Sensibility, which is why I queued it up in the first place (I'm Jane Austen's whore), but it's just horribly disappointing. Unfortunately, the acting is terrible (even from actors I've liked in other things), the two leads are orange, the plotting is clunky, and the romantic couples have minimal chemistry. The Nora and Edward characters are somewhat okay together, but they're hampered by this weird janitor lawsuit subplot that just detracts from the traditional story instead of enhancing it. The thing that stuck with me the most from the movie: sometime in the last few years, Fez (from That 70s Show) became super hot (I didn't even realize it was him until the last 10 minutes...and then I felt like a moron and had to go back and rewatch scenes to obsess about how blind I was). Also, there were two weird directorial choices: constant freeze-framing at the beginning that almost caused me to turn it off (why, why didn't I?) and a total lack of music in several scenes that required it, including a wedding celebration (there has to be royalty-free music that would fit?).

The Last Word was a neat concept: a guy makes a living writing suicide notes for others. And I really think it could have been a great movie, but the actors felt like they were all just phoning it in. Wes Bentley did a decent job, but it just wasn't enough. I guess the director had called for "low-key" acting, but between a mourning Winona Ryder and a depressed Ray Romano, this movie came close to making me want to enlist Evan's note-writing services.

Question My Judgment

I cannot believe I just spent 2 hours of my life watching a movie called Snowmageddon.

It was about an evil snowglobe that, among other sinister things, shot spikes out of the ground to kill people. It also reactivated a volcano that had been dormant for centuries. I think. I was only half-heartedly watching by that point, but somehow they were relating the whole thing to the Pandora's Box myth.

Oddly enough, the evil snowglobe did not send a blizzard. But there was a Cylon...

Movie 1/26: Crazy Stupid Love

I can't figure out how to punctuate the title of this movie. All material I read says Crazy, Stupid, Love, but the DVD box just says Crazy Stupid Love. I'm going with the box because I like tangible sources.

If I ever had any plans of rating each movie I watched with a star system (truth: I didn't), this movie would have completely screwed that up right out of the gate. I would have spent hours debating between 2, 3, or 4 stars. In the end, I probably would have settled on 3.27 slightly transparent stars.

There's a lot to like about this movie. It has a stellar cast, no doubt, and the chemistry between all of the actors (romantic and bromantic [I can't believe I just typed that word]) is wonderful. Ryan Gosling continues to be a fantastic actor (and unbelievably sexy to boot), and I always love Steve Carell when he does more dramatic roles. I've adored Julianne Moore for as long as I can remember, and I'm fast becoming a fan of anything Emma Stone does (although I still can't bring myself to watch The Help. It just looks too sappy and forced heartwarming.). Added bonus: Josh Groban. Not a fan of his music, but I have a total crush on the dude (if you've watched his appearances on Nevermind the Buzzcocks and didn't get a crush on him, please tell me your secret). He plays a complete douche, but I didn't care because it was Josh.

The film also has some truly hilarious and well-acted dramatic moments. It's ridiculous at (many) times, but it also feels very real. There's good character development throughout the movie, with the typical stumbles and lapses you'd expect a real person to have as they move toward great changes.

In the end, I think if the storyline with the teenage babysitter love triangle weren't in the movie, I would have liked it a lot more. Granted it contributed greatly to the movie's funniest scene, but the whole deal just squicked me out to the point where I couldn't get past it.

Also, Marissa Tomei's character was a total PITA, and a complete embarrassment to Eighth Grade English Teachers everywhere (sidenote: In what world is it appropriate to read Scarlet Letter in eighth grade? I'm waiting for the fallout from teaching Much Ado About Nothing each year, and this woman's getting to teach Scarlet Letter to junior high kids? No dice, people.).